PLOT FOR TURTLE

Heather:

give him an apple tomorrow and say "one half of this apple has poison injected into it...the other side is clean...do you feel...lucky?"

Heather:

whilst extending your arm with the apple in it towards him

Me:

no if i feed it, it will stay or come back

Heather:

not if it eats the poison side!

Heather:

the real trick is to put poison all through it

Heather:

mwahahaha

Me:

but i have no poison to poison it with

Heather:

hmmm

Heather:

well that does ruin things  a little

Me:

i know eh

Heather:

no matter! we will just come up with a better and more mind boggling plan!

Heather:

*laughs hysterically then starts coughing*

Me:

mwahahahahhahaha sounds like a plan

 Heather:

ok so that no one knows who we are talking about we will call this boy...turtle

Heather:

so when turtle comes up to you tomorrow....first...do you have a yellow rope?

Me:

hmm, i do not

Me:

i have....a bobby pin

Heather:

hmmm

Heather:

could you paint it yellow?

Me:

i could try

Heather:

ok well it doesnt need to be yellow anyways

Me:

what about a yellow piece of paper?

Heather:

you know the little glue parts on the end? well if you take those off they scratch like a little mouse trapped in a cardboard box

Heather:

i suggest you poke him with the unglued end of a bobby pin...and then when he opens his mouth the yelp in pain you shove the crumpled up piece of said paper in his mouth

Heather:

thus silencing his cries for help

Me:

mwahahahaha sounds sexcellent

Heather:

then if you HAD some rope you could tie him up and throw him into the gym equipment room and leave him for dead and the rats to dispose of his fleshy corpse

Heather: